Reflection

Thinking back about this week, it has been an eventful week actually, a lot of things happen that made me happy and also sad. I found out that as you grow up, things become clearer and you start to get more serious with things, for example, in studies, in life, romances, everything becomes more serious, and also, I experienced my 1st blush while talking about someone, that has never happened before, feels good at times. :-) I'm like getting more and more serious about this crush. Lolz, I might look back at this blog 1 day and laugh about what I just wrote, but somehow, I don't wish that to happen, I don't wish for it to become a laughing matter in the end. Is perseverance really going to reward me? Or basically I should let it go just to avoid further heart breaks? And thinking back, I don't really understand her yet, I wish to. Maybe we're not compatible, maybe we're total opposites that don't even compliment each other. But if I never try to make it a reality, how would I know? Looking on the bright side, we could be the best thing that ever happened in this world. But what the heck, time is still on my side, we'll see how everything unfolds.

Ok, seriously, I got to start posting some pictures, look, I've uploaded the Japan pics and they'll be up soon, till next time
tataz!!!!

Holiday is over and results have come in.

Holidays are over, and being a blogger, I actually din update my blog at all through the whole course of the holidays. And since my blog has become more of a journal, I just write in it whenever I have the mood to write, and today is 1 of those times. Results have come in, shockingly, I got very good results in my biology paper(thank god!!) but if course, I flunked my maths paper so badly, but luckily not the lowest in school this time, hehez. Well, seems like I and a fewother friends were the only one's cruising and relaxed after eceiving our results, the rest were like so tensed and worried, i know i should be, but somehow, I know there is still a chance for me to come back, though I need to work so freaking hard to get there, phew, what to do, I chose Form 6 right? wakakakakaz.

Anyway, I skipped 2 classes of biology today, giving the excuse that I had to finish my project, I just wanted to stay and spend time with someone, missed seeing her throughout the whole duration of the holidays. I know I should keep my distance, but there is no harm in just chatting right? Just a small chat with her cheers me up so much, I loved talking to her today, it was quite amazing, though like I said, it was just small talk.(Luckily teacher forgot what he had already taught us and taught the class birds again, so luckily I skipped class.) I know sometimes, I'm being to obvious, so I'm still trying to tone down a lot. In a great mood today, lolz.

By the way, during the holidays, I went out with a few of my friends but I no longer find the outings exciting or fun anymore, feels like its missing a lot of things, going out watching movies no longer akes me happy, singing in redbox is also not that fun anymore, kinda like lost the zest already. Oh well, as we grow up, our interests change, what to do. Ok I will write until here today, till next time.

Tataz!!!

Superb Mistakes and Watching From Afar.....

2nd day and I found out that I blew my Biology essay by writing in point form!!!!!! Damn!!!!! I have always written in point form, no teacher told me, so this time, I'm probably gonna get screwed left and right, top to bottom. My mom just told me that I was the only 1 who can be blamed, and she's right, its entirely my fault, should have asked before I started the test, haiz...... Dang, bad results for this exam again, sucks...... ok, here goes the record for now, PA X, Bio X, Muet ok, Chem X, Maths is sure gonner, so hmm, I wonder now, how hard am I gonna die? Lolz.

The watching from afar part, lolz ya, you know what I'm talking about. I can watch from afar. I like watching from afar sometimes, she looks cute, hahaz. Hate to see her frown though, she always has that frowning face when she's stressed, and I can't do anything about it. If i were to go near abit, I think she would say that I treat her to good, so, again, DISTANCE...... I still wish her all the best, and I still love seeing her smile.... I might 1 day look back at this and laugh to myself, though I hope what I'm dreaming now becomes a reality.

Till tomorrow, tataz!!!

Exams and Friendship Probs....

Exam time is here and I just got through my 1st 2 papers for the whole exam, PA and Biology. Biology was good but PA, argh, found out what graph i needed to draw in like the last 10 minutes. Manage to sketch the graph, but no colour and no petunjuk means DOOM in the exam. Ah well, at least I had a field day with Biology, took me like 50 minutes to write the whole darn essay, lets just hope i get good results this time, I need this a lot.

Anyway, some thing happened on Saturday that kinda changed my world upside down, can't really say it here, as to respect my friend and our own privacy, but it kinda put a lot of things in perspective and how much I have caused trouble for people. Realising that we cannot do things that we deem good or useful at the expense of other people's suffering. Well, we're still talking, but things have changed, so, will try to work it out, it is the exam, and the both of us ain't exactly free to talk right now. Although I will hope that it will work out in the end, I know that, no matter what, things have changed, it will be a hard time for me and also my friend and may be straining to our friendship, wishing her the best of luck, and sorry for all the inconveniences caused. Even though I write it here, she doesn't visit my blog, so its just an apology that she might not see. I have to control myself and contain myself and fill my days with activities to get my mind off these things, don't wanna make things as complicated as it already is. To make her high school life happy and to have our friendship last. I may suffer in the middle, but what to do, I love to see her smile more than to see her frown, so distance is what I need to keep now. Be happy my friend, I got your message, and all the best to you.....

Tataz, till next time.